Scott. 20. Manchester.

isitscary:

My daughter is blind! She is blind and tiny and helpless and fragile. She cannot help you!

(Source: robert-downey-junior, via pure-narcissism)

Notes
51750
Posted
53 minutes ago

GREATEST IMPROVISED LINE EVER

(Source: fifthharmony, via pure-narcissism)

Notes
326193
Posted
53 minutes ago

sixpenceee:

Informal infographic depicting evolution 

(via pure-narcissism)

Notes
40247
Posted
54 minutes ago

36 Things You Obviously Need In Your New Home

beben-eleben:

A Fire Pit IN THE POOL

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A Door That Turns into a Ping-Pong Table

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Chilled Produce Drawers in the Kitchen

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A Wine Cellar Trap Door

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 A Sleepover Room

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A Door Handle That Automatically Turns Off Electricity and Gas When You Leave

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A Swing-Set Dining Table

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A Built-In TV for the Bathtub

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A Glass-Encased Fireplace

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 A Loft Hammock

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A Hot Tub That Flows from the Inside to Outside

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A Huge Round Bedroom Window

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A Stained-Glass Door

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A Library Staircase/Slide

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A Bone-Shaped Pool for Your Dog

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(via pure-narcissism)

Notes
778714
Posted
56 minutes ago

lesbeeanmovie:

greencarnations:

cinematicsymphony:

This is so accurate. At school, we literally have children who will watch our facial expressions to see if them falling is as bad as they think it might be.

CORRECT CHILD INJURY PROCEDURE:

  • do not react. at the most, maybe wince and go “ooooh”
  • go over to the child to assess panic level and severity of injury
  • if they’re like, dying, remain calm, but they’re probably not.
  • look them in the eye and ask, “you okay?” they will nod. possibly all teary-eyed. then ask, “are we gonna need to cut it off?”
  • the child is thrown off. if they giggle, you’re in the money. if they do not, put a bandaid on and do some sympathetic patting. they are probably a little teary. let the sad little bug sit out for a minute. they will quickly get bored.
  • works every time

"sad little bug" is the cutest and most accurate term ive heard used to describe a child because sometimes bugs are kinda super cute sometimes bugs are really fucking annoying and sometimes bugs are downright TERRIFYING

(Source: kaliskadyami, via allhailcrowleylonglivetheking)

Notes
215601
Posted
1 hour ago

the-time-goddess-of-221b:

bard-of-time-will-be-late:

mori-ar-ti:

my mom was playing world of warcraft and someone said “fuck off” and she said “such language” and the next person said “very swear” and the next said “much offensive” and basically my mom started crying and blamed me

WoW.

Did you just

(via ruby-brown)

Notes
159559
Posted
1 hour ago
grandson-desmond:

vampire-bunni:

usedtodohugs:

oshiin:

how about no

Is this a Halloween decoration or a picture of a house in Australia?

In Australia all our houses look like that, we ride them to school sometimes.

AhahahahaNOPe.

grandson-desmond:

vampire-bunni:

usedtodohugs:

oshiin:

how about no

Is this a Halloween decoration or a picture of a house in Australia?

In Australia all our houses look like that, we ride them to school sometimes.

Ahahahaha

NOPe.

(Source: humortrain, via rabutthole)

Notes
183606
Posted
1 hour ago

dark-radiant-mind:

pregnantzombie:

note-a-bear:

chauvinistsushi:

sourcedumal:

boosabe:

spiritgun:

liftedandgiftedd:

3 people stealing the same bike [video]

smh…

entirely fed up with this world 

Damn….

Racism right here.

White people steal, and it’s BRUSHED OFF AND OTHER PEOPLE HELP

Black person? MOB of people come to attack him.

*lies down*

but it’s all in our heads though

This shit is infuriating

They helped the white girl steal it. Not just let her steal it, but HELPED her steal it.

(Source: unvitation, via indietwat)

Notes
140099
Posted
1 hour ago

so-tired-of-running:

del0ppus:

If someone ever tells you a certain song is important to them you should turn it up and lay on your bed and close your eyes and really listen to it even if its 10 minutes long because at the end you will know that person much better I think

My love for this post is unbelievable.

(via indietwat)

Notes
680933
Posted
1 hour ago

seabelle:

I can’t stand these fucking people with these fucking family window stickers on their cars a murderer is gonna come into your fucking house and you’re gonna try to hide your kids in the fucking closet and he’s gonna be like naw bitch I saw your fucking mini van I know you have six more kids where are they

(via indietwat)

Notes
75431
Posted
1 hour ago

dutchster:

when they say the name of the movie in the movie

image

(via dandelioniinthespring)

Notes
369188
Posted
1 hour ago
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